Aspiring vs Being, Shunning the Non-Believers

Aspiring vs Being, Shunning the Non-Believers I wanted to introduce you all to an old friend (we went to NYU together!) a new client, Andi Whaley. Andi is a black belt martial artist as well as a kickboxing running coach, I know her awesomeness firsthand shes my kickboxing coach! Andi is not only skilled as a teacher (it turns out that, although Ive been doing cardio kickboxing for years, I have little to no technique!), she is both inspirational motivational without coming across as a mean drill sergeant. Her enthusiasm is contagious its been such a privilege to work with her as her coach client! As a former pound-the-pavement-er (like me!) with dreams of Broadway footlights, Andi has recently decided to open shop for herself pursue this new dream of being a running kickboxing coach full-time. Her blog, Hit Runners, is just the start of the amazing business shes building. Read on to hear what shes experiencing by trading in an old passion for a new one! Molly Barker, founder of AWESOME AWESOME Girls On the Run asked in her blog  the other day  for people to respond with what hidden secrets, fears or behaviors you had as a child still rear their ugly heads as an adult.   This happened to come across my news feed on the very same Tough (Question) Tuesday that a certain life coach was on vacation, and I thought, wow, I am getting my Tough Question anyway!   No escape!   Interestingly, this topic is one that has been swimming around in my head a LOT lately as I journey through a plethora of emotions related to my career, my life purpose, the things I love and the things I am ready to let go of, so without even a moment of pondering, I responded with the following: Something that has been slapping me in the face recently is my sometimes inability to truly take ownership of who or what I AM.   As a young girl who was very headstrong about what I wanted to be when I grew up, I was met with a lot of people who, in retrospect, didnt buy it.   I remember being very confused by the very mixed messages I got:   You can be whatever you want, but dont say that you ARE an artist/actress/singer/dancer/writer/fill-in-the-blank, say that you aspire to be one.   The thing was, my young self wasnt concerned with success or money or  glory as much as creating and performing and how wonderful it made me feelyet I became exceedingly self-concious and self-doubtful about whether I really deserved and praise or recognition or even roles in shows because, after all, I was only aspiring.   Certainly there were people who were more experienced/talented/special. When I eventually did grow up and pursue a career in the arts, my interpretation of this missive was that I wouldnt actually BE an actress until I reached a certain level of financial success through acting, or at least a certain milestone like a Broadway show or a feature film.   I heard, and continue to hear, Fake it til you Make It as a mantra, and I just wonder, at what point do you make it?   The most wonderful moment for me as an actor came in a show that was in a 70 seat studio, ran for 2 weeks, paid $200 and I was Ensemble Member #4.   And yet is was magic, and made me feel fulfilled as an artist in ways I never conceived of.   I cant imagine any Broadway opening FEELING like that.   But does it mean I made it because I had that experience?   Its hard for me to believe that.   I continue to aspire. Now almost a decade and a half has passed since I moved to New York and pursued this dream and I have decided Im tired of Faking it until I Make it.    Maybe the damage is done for me as an actress, I will continue to pursue  as it passes my fancy, but Ive decided to start  fresh with a new career and NOT  fake it.   I am a coach.   I am a motivator.   No one can argue that with me  because I know it to be true.   I will continue to be educated and to expand my knowledge, but who I am is enough to BE, not to  ASPIRE. I think this can also apply to the folks I am trying to reach through HitRunners.   So very many people think that sports or fitness is ALL or NOTHING and that they cant call themselves a RUNNER or a MARTIAL ARTIST or an ATHLETE.   But there are an awful lot of stages between ALL or NOTHING.   As far as I am concerned, anyone who goes outside with the purpose of going a little farther or a little faster than the last time is an athlete.   If you are picking it up into a jog, you are a runner.  You may be a beginner!   But you ARE.   Taking ownership of what you are doing is an unbe-HA-LIEVABLE motivator! Listen, like I wrote to Molly, my whole life by my parents, my family, my teachers, my friends and my martial arts instructors I have been taught modesty.   Theres nothing wrong with being humble.   But if modesty and humility get in the way of our own self-worth, weve gone too far.    So take whatever it is you know you are in your heart and introduce it to your head. Shun the non-believers. NOTE: So Andi has evolved her biz since she wrote this post way back in 2009, and her blog Hit Runners has been put aside wanna get an update? Check out this post. Andi used to be a rejected, dejected, unfulfilled musical theatre actress afraid to walk away from what was no longer her dream â€" three years later she’s a running coach, a graduate student and working for folks who think that her theatre background is an asset. She’s been published on  LIVESTRONG.com  and met the love of her life while volunteering â€" because she can make time for that now.